Compatibility Time Bomb- CD4

Compatibility Time Bomb
Fatal flaws.. etc.. is obstacles within..
Compatibility is obstacles externally..

Romeo and Juliet were deeply in love, but does true love conquer all? No!
The problem in the relationship often come over time… Problem start to surface after some time.. until the reality hits them. If you are already married, and your have this CTB.. you need to pay close attention to it.. ignoring it won't make your problem goes away.. get help.

5 Compatibility Time Bomb that can destroy a relationship easily
1.) Significant Age Different
16 years old.. 89 years old.. 63 years old age gap. How much is age different a problem? Eric 58.. Mei Ling 32.. Eric want so relax.. Mei Ling want to go karaoke.. Eric (What's wrong with wanting to stay at home with my wife?).. Mei Ling wants to go out..have fun with friends.. Eric (May be I am too old for u after all.. ).. 26 years gap between them.. having diff social needs and interests.. Eric been working hard his life..he just want to slow down and enjoy life.. neither one were wrong.. They just have incompatible need!..

Old women married young man.. wants baby… man get pressured, not financially stable.. "you sounds like my nagging mother?".. get impatient.. began to judge and resent.. and begin to doubt on the commitment the man have… are they not in love?
Are they wrong? No! they are just in different stage of life.. !

If your partner is 10 or more older than you.. it's gonna cost problem. Older will get impatient with the young one. Older one cannot respect a younger person. There's a danger that one acting like a parent.. Marriage suppose to be 2 person with equal standing. And problem of temptation gonna be very real now.This type of relationship can only work, if both really committed and compromise. It needs hard work.

2.) Different spiritual conviction.
The more extreme the difference of conviction, it's going to explode!
2 corinthians 6: 14 do not be unequally yoke together with unbeliever… how can a Christian married a non-christian.. the value are totally different! Children raising.. different family background. Mother take kids to temple.. funeral service.. years later, kids grown up.. "daddy..why are you smoking, drinking, gambling? The bible say.. etc etc..".. the kid embarrassed the daddy in front of his friends..

Same spiritual conviction as well.. even if both are Christians.. what is his/her view on prayer.. fasting..speaking in tongue..healing, miracle.. church.. cell group.. ministry..serving..tithing.. offering.. building fund.. your life is never gonna be happy if you don't serve God..

It's going to be tough.. when a catholic married a protestant.. a charismatic married a conservative.. how can 2 walk together if they are not in agreement?

3.) Different social ethnics and educational background
1 is the high social class.. another one grew up in village… 1 is the high education..another one is from primary school. My fair lady.. pretty women.. shows diff background causes problem. A very painful compatibility time bomb. A healthy relationship is base on the common things you share. Same taste, same style, etc.. too much differences will creates too much tensions. Trying to criticize your partner for the differences is only going to create more hurts. Incompatibility.. the partner cries.. and realized.. love is just not enough to compromise this.. we learn from our differences.. but if the differences are too extreme.. it will creates problem. Usually different backgrounds also causes difference value in a person.. how you view life.. how you achieve your goals.. etc..

4.) Over bearing in-laws.
Mother in law keep calling her son.. A marriage is more than 2 people.. it's 2 families and their extended families. You usually dunno much about them until you step into the family.. overbearing in-laws don't respect the boundaries of your marriage.. they ll keep calling you.. you will feel stressed out and demand a lot of energy. Over bearing in-laws simply don't let go of their kids.. to them, their children are still not married in their eyes. They don't respect you.. to them, their kids must only love them. "tell the husband of yours, to look for a better job.."… or.. "your mother say this.. etc.." .. "why can't you just get along with her?".. instead of getting support.. you feel frustrated. A man shall leave his parents and be join with his wife. If you are with someone that stick to home too much.. he just isn't ready for marriage. Trust God for a better one. Once you are married, you must clearly define the boundary with the parents.

5.) Long distance relationship
Country.. the goal of 2 person in love is to be more intimate .. the goal of 2 person in LDR.. is to see each other again. You don't see your partner in diff situation.. you dunno about their character. You and your partner never learn to solve problems.. when you meet, it's short time and you just trying to spend time on good thing. Unrealistic picture.

:D Enjoy Reading!!!