Tuesday, July 31, 2007

my hantu friend

Midnight..someone will always be there working hard.......

Having someone just over the MSN, showing "online" status.. just make you felt not so ALONE... right?

I wish you rainbows. ;)


I just got pissed off again yesterday. :(
The customer issue is killing my brain cell..

When i was so desperate for an answer/guidance from the expert, what i get is "I dunno"....
"i dunno."
"i dunno."

20% resentment in me......
"i dunno"

"i dunno, ask the expert.."

There goes....... i just sit there, focus my energy and draft out the trip proposal within 15mins.. grrrrr!!!

Impatient!!!!!!! Once again, i am being impatient :(

we cannot married larrrr

In the midst of hasty discussion, .... i just said..

"arghh,... we cannot married larrr!!"

Wonder what on earth am i to pop up with such statement!!! Since that......
Last 2 meets,
"arrgg.. we cannot married larrr......"
"that's why.."
"keep argueing one......"


Monday, July 30, 2007

Job nature change

There has been some major change in my department.

only 1 week from now and ..ha, of course i got a bit pissed off at times.. a bit ok at times...
Often being reminded.. when your team failed, YOU FAILED!!!

Keep reminding myself on :
--> Anger only comes when you do not understand.. Seek to understand. ;)

"Encourage one another and build each other up"

So easy to say..and sometimes, it is SUPER hard to be done!!! argh!!
Once again, i gotta persevere like the kachuak!

Thursday, July 26, 2007


Life, is just a game.

Level 1: Age0-Age6
Learn basic survival skills-to communicate, to eat, to crawl, to walk, to jump, to fullfil your needs.

Level 2: Age 7-12
Pick up knowledge to prepare for secondary school.
Study hard for UPSR
Exploring your interests and hobbies.

Level 3: Age 13-18
Level1: Study Hard ahieve flying colors in PMR
Level 2: Decide which main streams you want to choose and study hard for SPM
Be extra active in co-curiculum because university needs it.

Level 4: Age 18-22
Study Hard for university degree.
Start socializing, staying outside, preparing for facing the reality out there.

Level 5: Age 22-???
This stage to me.. err..
Earlier stage.. you work and try achieve certain position, salary, etc..
Then reality hits you bit by bit and you start to feel overcome by the world a bit...
You reminded yourself that you want to overcome all these uncertainity....
Then u charged up.. go on and on...
Then you realize your passion and purpose on earth and pursueing after them..
Then you met the one and start to set up family...
Bigger responsibilities sets in..
Bigger commitments...

wow... then the next level i dunno ady......coz not yet not yet.........err..But neh, the conclusion=

When you are overwhelmed by the worlds' disappointments.. hurts from friends... from love one... remember, this is only a PHASE of your life........... Many people is walking the same path with you.. they face the lost of direction you are facing too... they were hurted badly by their loved one too... But this is a growing up process.. it is a life long process until the day you leave this earth................. LIve a victorious life:)

Because... He come, so that we may have life, and have it more ABUNDANTLy!! :D

Tuesday, July 24, 2007


Management is about..

70% of building your people up..
30% of achieving your results



A 40DOC emphasizing on LOVE..

Love is Patient, Love is kind, it does not envy, it does not easily angered. Love does not delight in evil but rejoice in the truth, it always protect, always trust and always persevere....

Patience=susah lo for me...
easily angered= too easy for me to angry..& got pissed off
truthfullness= too direct and harsh in words...

Last night CG talking about this.. hahahahaa...
We both impatient ppl.........laughed! :P

1 Thessalonians 5:11
Encourage one another and build each other up

Honesty, truthfullness...
But be wise to speak tactfully..TACTFULLY~~~

Monday, July 23, 2007


Buat 2 things last nite....
1.) Portugese egg tarts
2.) Raisin cookies
Advertisement...........Ah Bee.. Tired after licking all the butter+sugar on the floor..wahahaha
Skin for egg tarts

yeah..Almost almost......be patient........!!!
**oops~~ so.. Tarts filling too sweet.. but it was awesome la..wakakakaa..~~

Sunday, July 22, 2007

Siao SeaFood...

Before i even finish at the PCC family camp... my sis called...."weii.. u coming back arrr?? we cook a lot of seafood lorrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr"

Managed to capture some picture.. hahhaa..+ our cute little dog.. Ah Bee!

So ngam, both also wearing Nepal shirts..

see see the cute little dog...

PCC Family Day

Ha..as usual..always did in Hamid Khan.. always raining... I wonder... but it was cool lar..seeing sporting ppl running around just to get 50points.. ahhaha!!!! senior citizen somemore!!! I really admire their spirit!!

I took care of the senior citizen tennis ball throwing session.. wahahaha.. i see aunty carry tongkat and throw the ball... FU YOooo!!!! AUNTY! u r the best!!!

managed to take 2 photos.. wahahaa..

Jamie bond...wakakaka

one of the game station...

Wednesday, July 18, 2007

Swimming against the stream

Reaching a certain point.... to decide..

Swimming across the stream?
Swimming along the stream?

...... *_* .........

David's Armor

1 Samuel 17:39 David fastened on his sword over the tunic and tried walking around, because he was not used to them. "I cannot go in these," he said to Saul, "because I am not used to them." So he took them off.

David, the young shepherd boy, heard the challenge from the Philistines to send someone to fight Goliath. No one volunteered to fight except David. King Saul reluctantly agreed and offered David his armor. David put on the weighty equipment, but quickly concluded he could not fight in this heavy armor.
God equips each of us in such a way that is unique to our strengths and abilities. David was trained as a shepherd to use another weapon. For David, it was a slingshot. David showed great maturity in realizing he could not be effective with Saul's armor.
What are the gifts and talents God has given to you? Have you ever tried to accomplish a task with tools you were not trained to use? God allows each of us to develop skills that are unique to our life. He will not call you to use someone else's tools.
However, this is only half of the equation. These talents must be mixed with faith. Talent alone is not enough. Faith alone is not enough. It is only when the two are combined that God's power is released and manifested in the physical realm.
Mix your unique gifts with faith today; you will be surprised at the power of God that will be manifested.

Tuesday, July 17, 2007

If God calls us to be a doer of His words..

I started to wonder lately..
If God calls us to be a doer of His words, what about Him?

God, I am waiting lerr....
Ah ha.. I am also doing....kekee..

so..ahem.. I am expecting something.... ok kah?



some are only for a season of your life,
some are those that see you through your life.

Love Hopes

Love hopes..
Love is being enthusiastic for someone else's accomplishment.

I must admit, this is one of my weakness.
I shared to the group.

Often, i felt when someone approach me happily, telling me that they accomplish something.. sometimes, unless the achievement are something that i never heard/over my expectation, else, i do not know how to react.

I find this as a weakness. Someone shared something... of course they are seeking to be heard and supported.. But often, due to the high standards i have on certain things..at the end of their sharing, i usually end up......... errrrr.............. stunned... **i do not know how to react!!***

someone say... is it u feel..
"cehhh.......................... ".. wahahahaa~~ I guess i am.... And man............. How should i overcome this weakness of mine?

Monday, July 16, 2007

Best friend's wedding

Haiz.. Watch best friend's wedding before?
I knew this gonna happened to me one day............. Just that i never thought it would be so soon.... :~

The guy whom i once love like crazy....
whom i were crying like mad driving my car to melaka looking for my closest friend...
whom i invited to celebrate my 20th birthday when i ON with my ex.......

It's been 8 years ago..............

And yesterday, he told me........
He registered.
He is getting married.

:~ My heart............ i thought i would be happy for him when the time come...
and right now........ my heart just dunno Y........ i felt pain..........

"Hey buddy, i wish you well in your marriage life. :)"
Once again, i realized... Love doesn't mean you need to be together......
Love can simply means, you want the other person to be happy with his life too...
Power of LOVE.

Baking Lessons

Follow my mummy to baking lessons last nite..
Wow..all aunty aunty there.. (i meant those really aunty one la... those got family one)..

30+ females with only i guess 5-6 males.. hahaa..

The teacher ajar us..
1.) Portugese Egg Tarts
2.) Chocolate cookies
3.) Chocalate cheese mousse cake

fuyo! I love the tarts and the cookies!! :D So yummy!!!
But my moon-sister knows me.. I AM A RAISIN LOVER! :D

kekekeekee!! so see when i will make my 1st egg tarts at home..kkekekkekekee............

>>>i miss my kor kor lorrr... kor kor leg injured dunno ok already or not... ?
>>>i also miss my old old friend lorrr... the other day dreamt of him getting married..sekali..he really is getting married soon.....WOW~ Dream sometimes can be so accurate!!! Gone my hope........haizzzzz........
>>>lepaking at home now waiting for my koko to buy rojak for me.. kekekeke~~
>>>thinking of getting a car hopefully.................
>>>thought of the heng jin's guy also.............wahahahahahahaha~~ memang...........
>>>dreamt of my another friend working too hard and suddenly collapse in front of me........WALOW, SEKALI..this one also real!!!!!!!!!!!!.........................!!!!! I hope he gonna be OK soon...........

A question was being asked...
"Will you be there if i fall down?"

"Of course, i will, my friend. :) You are somebody special to me. And i truly appreciate our friendship."

Sunday, July 15, 2007

心。。my heart




Suddenly, i do not know how to react.....
Perhaps, just let it be.....
I gotta continue my journey in this life...... :)

Pursuit of Happiness

Ha! Finally i got the DVD version of this to keep..
I just fall in love with the Will Smith inside the show..

his peserverance..
his determination...
his pressing on even facing with many stressful incidents..
his striving for excellence....

SIMPLY AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I LOVE U, WILL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MUAKS!


Just went online to check within these 3 main subscribers in malaysia...
Malaysia only have these 3 main subscriber?

celcom got kasih free phone lerr.. but the first month payment=Rm650..? is not that already pay for the phone?

Digi prepaid, fu-yoh.. wow, a lot of plans here and there.. i check check also i feel blur.

Maxis neh.. dunno is it cheap if i get sub-line from my sister? haahhaa.. my bro suggested.

well~~ Let's see...................
I falling in love with the NOKIA 5400.. White n Red one.... Itu Beckz punya kawan lorrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr...........!! Met up with them last saturday.. come all the way to Penang just to eat??? haahhahaha, i kept asking to confirm!.. itu KL ppl..... ~


Friday, July 06, 2007

The message of Babel

It was quite a day.
Started with an accounting personel spoke harshly to me..
And i was determining on the discussion with boss...
Got pretty pissed off...
met some friends over lunch time, which coincidently my cousin who dated me also there, and met some church friends at the same place.
Puzzled, someone spoke something to me which changed my perception..when perception set in, it soon followed by reasoning, and soon, complexity.

My intention to help, turned out to be stupidity in someone's eye.
Someone's reasoning, turned out to be the complication of his mind in my view.
My rising up, someone else going down,..
someone else rising up, someone else fall......

Just as i was driving home, reasoning and screening through the last conversation with a friend....... at that moment..I have come to a conclusion:

1.) Phases of life--> we are in different phase of life each time. A friend asked me this, "Do you love yourself/God/others?".. Without an hesitation, i said,"Myself"... Am i giving him the answer he wanted to hear? Or am i just at that moment.. the answer pop up?..
2.) Forget former thing. Press On, admit mistake, seek help, GROW and move on.
3.) Every moment is a moment of decision. People can comment on you, people can put you down, people can praise you, people can advise you, people can say a lot of things........YET, the final decision, is SOLELY upon YOU!

Further on...........something strike me!
What about the connection?!
You make a decision, YES, YOU, and YES, you are responsible for the consequences.
You Sin, you are responsible.
You decide, you are responsible.
What about those that interelated?
you made a decision, you suffer for it..and don't forget, those that suffered together knowingly and unknowingly.
You said something negative, you just expressing yourself.......but, don't ever forget, how those words might sink into someone else mind.
You do something, you be responsible for it, YES, and......Don't, Never Forget those that are interelated!

The power of connection!

Someone lend me the CD.
All the incidents happened through out the days....
My reasoning in the car.......
My decision to watch Babel.........
And Babel.... It showed me CLEARLY, the power of CONNECTIOn!!

A decision of yours, lead to the suffering of you and others unrelated........Someone else's decision, leads to your suffering.....
something coming, which results from someone else's decision........ just as you were still suffering and trying to recover from the previous trial........!

Suddenly, the Kairos course i attended at EPCC back in 2006 caught my attention. "God, the church and the World", focussing on.. our recognition of ALL are called to take a vital part in world evangelization", of becoming a World Christian that focus on the World View of....

God is in absolute control of everything. His will is clearly revealed in the bible. God is totally committed to & actively involved in fullfilling His will.

..the powerpoint slides someone forwarded to me....
"For everything you have missed, you have gained something else; and for everything you gain, you lose something else"

..my yesterday's blog on the story of a dog and maturity..........

The interconnection.
The association.
The Attachment.
The bond.
The Tie.

Once Again, Maturity is an ON GOING process.
Maturity is a choice.
Maturity is about making a WISE decision, considering different aspects of impacts on yourself and others.

It is about your NEXT ACTION once recognizing the POWER OF CONNECTION!

Thursday, July 05, 2007

Tu Dia!!!

After all it's your life then why give chance to others to rule our life."

Wednesday, July 04, 2007

The Story of a Dog

A man walked pass a house and saw a dog, being tied at lamp post and keep barking at him.
Curious, he approached the dog.
Wonder, why is he keep barking??

He knocked the owner's house.
"Hello, Mr, why is your dog keep barking and no one seems to care?"
"Hello... The dog always bark and i don't want to care a shit"

Walking off.... the dog continued to bark..
Curiousity and sympathy... The man approached the dog once again.
Suddenly, he noticed there's a Nail stucked at the dog's butt, and he guessed he was in pain, and that's the reason he barked.

He knocked the owner's door again.
"Hello, Mr, i think your dog's butt is painful, stucked with nail, that's y it bark"
"Hello.. plsss... We know that.. whenever we want to help him, he just bark and even want to bite us... we try and try, but now, we don want to care a shit!!! It's his choice!"

Moral of the Story:
There will be obstacles in life, sometimes, we got stucked by it and it is causing us painfulness and bitterness.

What we need to do next is a CHOICE:
A.) We realized our weakness, ask help from others, grow from it and move on.
B.) We sit there, depressed, complaint, and continue to remain stuck.

It is a CHOICE. :)

Suddenly, the passage of 1 Corinthians 13:11.....
11When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me.

Maturity is an ON GOING process.
Maturity is a CHOICE.

Tuesday, July 03, 2007

当我说。。。when i say

When i say, I love you, I, really love you..

When I say, I need my space.. I, really need my space..

When i say, I am not happy.. I, really are not happy.

When i say..I don't want to answer this question, I, really don't want to answer this question.

When i say, I have already disappointed with you, I have really disappointed with you already.

有时候。。我,开始觉得。。 诚实,究竟是一种美德,还是一种缺陷?
Sometimes, I start to wonder.. Honesty, A virtue or A deficiency?


Today..Utterly depressed....

Taught a friend of mine, to type in Mandarin..


快乐。。。 只需要以真心对待别人,而别人也真心地对待你。
Happiness.. It's after you treat others with sincerity, and receive the same sincerity from them.

Monday, July 02, 2007


晚风轻轻的吹, 带来一丝伤悲,在异乡仰望月圆的光辉。
有过梦,就想追, 欣慰有你一起陪。。。
流星划过夜幕的刹那, 我们一起飞!


当你觉得自己迷路了。。 你,会一直走?寻找出口。。。 还是一直等待?



昨夜。。更一名友人讲起了从前当兵的精神。。。那。。被学长没理由的体罚。。 我们。。也笑笑的。。傻傻的。。。把全部都做完。。。


让我们欢呼。。。坚持下去。。绽放出。。我们那不屈不挠的精神。。! 加油!!



打从大学的第一天。。 有了一班敢敢来,有义气的朋友。。。tuang 了minggu haluan siswa morning exercise..
一口气吃两包面,跟两包麦片,鸡蛋。。。 傻傻的。。
当兵被折磨。。欺负。。暗恋。。明恋。。。 哈!!

今夜。。。 我。。 突然想起了他。。。

萤火虫。。。 你还好吧?





At times, i often feel that i sometimes speak the right thing at the right time to the right people..
but at times, i just felt utterly disappointed with myself.....
disappointed with some friends....useless friends...........

There are many types of friends.. someone who be there with you when you are rich, influential, at good time, and disappear when you are in your moment of distress, the moment you are lost...... these are not friends.

I suddenly felt that, again and again in my life, i faced these problem with some friends.
Some friends loves to critisize..
Some friends are self centered..
Some friends are just so selfless....
Some friends are always confident and cheerful..
Some are outgoing and adventurous..
some are helpful and caring..
some are useless...
some are meaningful....

many.............. some friends, they take the extra miles to help you, to care for you, to be with you all the way.......... And i really appreciate those friends.

Many times, i do ask myself, What kind of friend am i to my friend?
Am i someone lovely?
Am i someone useless ?

I used to read this..

it's sounded so proud.......but yet, it sounded so true as well.....

I told my friends sometimes, on earth, we are not the HERO..we are not the SAVIOUR, we can only do what is at our best trying to be someone's good friends..to be there, to cry together, to hold each other along the way...... Coz, there's only one life, One same journey that we are in here on earth.............

Talked to a friend last nite, question been pondering my mind lately.
"Are you building something that will last?"
"What is your priorities on earth?"
"Are you the owner of everything you owned?/ Or are you just a steward?"

We, human, are always in the refining process of God, to be a better person each day.
And i want to say, to all my friends, whom i have offended, whom i have loved, whom i have hated, whom i have hurted, who belong to the past, who will come along in the future...... I thank you for your presence and i truly appreciate every parts that you played in my life.

I thank God that I have lived a 26years+ of wonderful life...................
Quoted from "meet Joe Black"... A life, which when you look backward, you realized, you have no regrets anymore.

Live a day as in that way.... that when everything fades away... You will look back and say.."Wow.. I am glad I finished well."

Philipians 3:13-14
Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.


Adopted from Ecclesiastes...

Meaningless! Meaningless!
Utterly meaningless!
Everything is meaningless!

What does man gain from all his labor at which he toils under the sun?

Generations come and generations go, but the earth remains forever.

The sun rises and the sun sets, and hurries back to where it rises.

The wind blows to the south and turns to the north; round and round it goes, ever returning on its course.

All streams flow into the sea, yet the sea is never full. To the plac the streams come from, there they return again.

All things are wearisome, more than one can say. The eye never has enough of seeing, nor the ear its fill of hearing.

What has been will be again, what has been done will be done again; there is nothing new under the sun.

Is there anything of which one can say, Look! This is somthing new? It was here already, long ago; It was here before our time.

There is no remembrance of men of old, and even those who are yet to come will not be remembered by those who follow..........

All things that are done under the sun; all of them are meaningless, a chasing after the wind.

Suddenly, i just have an echo with all these........